Happiness is what we all seek and relentlessly work for in our lives. But how many of us actually achieve it is debatable; leave alone achieving it most of us do not even have a proper definition of it, we do not know what is that we are seeking which will lead us to eternal happiness.
As a child the happiness is linked to passing the exams, winning a game, or winning over a friend however one exam follows other, friends come and go but eternal happiness remains elusive. As the child grows into a youth the pursuit continues with the goal post for happiness changing from clearing a desired competitive exam, getting admission in the desired college, getting a job, getting married, getting a salary hike, becoming a father; the list keeps on adding but the happiness is still not guaranteed. The life keeps passing and the race for happiness goes on with no definite solution in sight.
What you just finished reading is the plot of every other story one reads on happiness. Where does my story fits in? As far as I remember marks and exams never bothered me in my school days; I was always confident I will pass and that was enough, how many marks I scored did not matter. The happiness came from the time I spent with my friends in school or with siblings at home, the atmosphere at home and was reflected in the peaceful and sound sleep I had every night. Though there were low moments, but they were few and far in between, life in general was cool. There was nothing called negativity or fear of unknown ever in mind.
Passed out of the school with reasonably good marks and got through the first competitive exam I appeared for. The thought ‘What will happen if I fail, if I am not selected?’ never crossed my mind either during preparations or while appearing in the exam. There was no pressure on me, either external or internal ‘I have to pass the exam’; maybe the lack of stress helped me in passing the exam. I was happy either way, I passed so I joined the training institute otherwise I would have happily continued with my college studies.
It is the expectations, internal and self-imposed, and the comparisons which are the core cause of stress and unhappiness. The day you stop comparing with others, just focus on what you want from life and what you want to achieve the life will become enjoyable. To love what you do is what matters in the journey of life.
The day you stop overloading yourself with expectations and stop passing on the blame for failure on to others life will get simpler and happier. It takes courage to own the failures; while production is the combined responsibility of the team, but the mistake/ failure must be owned by the one who overlooked or missed checking it. The day every individual of the team starts taking responsibility for their individual actions no time will be wasted on fixing blames for the faults committed and the faults will be rectified at a much faster pace. The willingness to own failure will create a lively and vibrant working atmosphere which will generate happiness for all. This is what I have achieved thus far in life; I have believed in owning failures rather than wasting time in apportioning blames, my team members have followed suit and never hesitated in accepting faults.
Every path will lead to happiness if you stop comparing, stop worrying about expectations and start taking responsibilities for your failures. It is your life, live it the way you want.
Aim to enjoy every happy moment of life instead of running after that elusive “Happy Ending”; Everyone will end up in a grave one fine day, anyways.