Where you reach, what you achieve in life is generally dependent on the education you gain during the journey (of life). It may not be just the formal education in the classrooms, but the informal education/ values one gains through elders or by just observing nature which will matter in fulfilling life’s purpose. The initial education (generally informal) gained during the first five or six years of life is what provides the foundation for the future. This is where the parents/ elders and the observation power of the child play the most important part.
My mother (she had not had formal education even up to middle school) was my first teacher and what she taught me has carried me through life. Middle school dropout herself, but a voracious reader, she well understood the meaning of good education and ensured the children got it. She had her own unique style, no makeup, confidence was the only jewellery she wore and carried it so well, simply beautiful. Brands never mattered and that is what she imbibed in all of us “Be your own brand, be known for what you are and not for what you wear”
Blessings and respect, one earns in life plays an important part in the overall growth of the individual. The more you earn (respect & blessings), bigger will be the circle of your well-wishers and stronger will be the support system available to fall back upon in the time of need.
Life is full of opportunities, you will not be able to grab all, but you can’t be fool enough to miss all. Make the best of all opportunities which you are able to hold on to. You will fail at places but as long as you keep going you will find other options. I once failed in one of my class tests in class III and when I came home and conveyed the News, her only response was “This is the not last exam, prepare and do well in the next”. Exam results seldom reflect the true potential of a child.
Do not ever be tied down by time and space. Never blame ‘Bad Time’ for your failures. Time is always good if you are not able to use it to your advantage, it’s your fault. After a failure never make statements like “Today was not my day”, accept that the ultimate winner was better, maybe your preparation was not up to the required standard. If you do not accept a shortcoming you can never rectify it. Learn to accept and own your mistakes, if you want to make amends.
You can’t keep everyone happy. Do whatever makes you happy. Your happiness is in your hands, but cheating, manipulation or corruption should never be the means to achieve it. This is one lesson which I have carried with me and followed religiously, till date.
We were a lower middle-class family and my father always travelled across different cities because of his profession. We stayed with the mother at one place for sake of our education. Her finance and time management were amazing. Working single handedly, she ensured everything was available to the kids at the time and place they wanted. We were never short of anything, specially her time. Despite the schedule, I never saw her losing her cool or passing over the stress (she certainly would have had) to anyone else. This is what made us, the kids, mentally strong and taught us to make best use of the resources/ time available. In my life, I have never been short of time and money and I have always had time for family, friends and whosoever else needed it. Every visitor to my office has this one observation “Why there is never anything/ any file pending on the table?” The reason is simple, the time management skills and the work ethics passed on by my parents. Do not leave anything you have started, unfinished. Do not hand it over to someone else to finish. Do not ever keep anyone waiting.
It’s the name, not the surname, which matters. Surnames are just a means to identify and not a means to differentiate. Humanity matters more than Religion, caste or community. In fact, as a child I could not relate surnames with religions because I was not taught do so. I had friends from all castes and communities who mostly hung around at my home as if it was their own.
Very religious herself, she never forced religious beliefs down the throat of her kids. I was never forced to partake in any religious functions or visit religious places. Mine is an inter-caste marriage and there was never a question ‘Why?’
Marriage is not just a union of a man and a woman. It’s a union of two families and the acceptance of their tradition and culture. Respect other’s way of life you will never have any problem. This is the only thing she told my wife when they met first time before my marriage, understand the family and culture, leave nothing to be regretted later. One thing my wife certainly missed at my place was ‘being a daughter in law’ because she remained a daughter always.
Being thankful for what I have got and the willingness to share whatever is in my control are two of the main lessons I have got from her.
I am sure all parents pass on good life lessons to their kids. It’s up to the children to make best use of the legacy.
Salutations to all Mothers…..