Killing softly and slowly with our words is what many of us actually do daily without even realising it. Most affected are the people around us, relations, office colleagues (specially subordinates).
We cause hurt by our arrogance, rude behaviour, derogatory language, causing humiliation and what not. It’s not about killing physically, but killing emotionally, breaking the confidence, hurting self- respect, subduing initiative.
“I will tell you what to do/ how to do” and “I know better” or “I am more experienced” syndrome is so prevalent in our lives and we just refuse to give it up, knowing fully well that this the main reason affecting growth, both personal and professional. At home the elders (generally the father) and in the offices the seniors are the ‘killers’. Being elder/ senior doesn’t necessarily mean we know better/ are more experienced. “Experience is more related to the situation one has been through in life and how he/ she responded to it, it has got less to do with the number of years one has spent on earth or in the same office”.
Being elder/ senior doesn’t give anyone a right to hurt/ humiliate. Most of the time the arrogant behaviour is the result of our own insecurities. We refuse to accept our weaknesses, make no efforts to improve and hide behind the veil of arrogance and our seniority.
Arrogant behaviour of senior, regular humiliation, more than teaching actually pushes the junior/ child away. As an elder the aim should always be to empower the younger by sharing your acquired wisdom guiding him through, facilitating him find solutions. The root cause of the problem lies in the fact that most of us refuse to grow out of the boot of being a ‘father/mother’ or a senior. Instead try being and elder, friend and guide. Moment the relationship paradigm changes you will find a definitive change in the environment. You will not be a killer anymore, rather you will be ‘adding’.
“Soft skills and not soft kills are what makes the person and organisation grow, improve your skills”