Write your own Destiny….

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It was the month of Nov in the year 1993. I was to travel from my home town to New Delhi , by train. Those days my home town Mhow ( India) used to be connected only by a Metre Gauge( MG ) Rail track year and one had to travel to Indore, nearest Railway station having Broad Gauge rail connection by a MG train, to travel to most other parts in India . It was a journey of just about 45 minutes by a passenger train from Mhow to Indore. There were two trains from Indore to New Delhi, departing at 3 pm and 5.15 pm respectively, every evening. I was to board the Express train, from Indore, leaving at 3 pm. A passenger train leaving at 1.45 pm in the afternoon provided a suitable connectivity , as it reached Indore at  2 .30 pm , giving the passengers a reasonable time of 30 minutes for changing over to the Express Train. 

I had been using this train connection to travel to New Delhi since years and there never had been any problem , there was never a cause for anxiousness. But that day in Nov 1993 was to be different. I boarded the passenger train , from Mhow , on schedule at 1.45 pm , and as luck would have been , the engine power failed midway , and the train reached Indore only at 4 pm , well after the departure of the Express train I was to board . The road connecting Mhow to Indore , runs nearly parallel to the rail track , and many passengers, anticipating the delay and chances of missing the train from Indore, got down from the passenger train and got onto any available vehicle going to Indore , to reach in time for the Express train. Somehow, my elder brother, who was travelling with me up to Indore, convinced me of not attempting anything adventurous with the reasoning that even if I missed the first train there was an alternative available at 5.15 pm . We waited and finally reached Indore at 4 pm and I managed to board the next train at 5.15 pm. I reached New Delhi at 6 am in the morning quite oblivious of the fact that the train I was originally scheduled to board from Indore at 3 pm had met with an accident enroute and not reached Delhi . It was only when I made a call to my home to confirm my safe arrival at Delhi that I learnt of the train accident. 

It was then that I decided never to rush in life, not to try and run ahead of my destiny. One should give a logical best to everything they try but not to the extent that the risk may lead to a permanent loss, unless there is a question of life and death and the only chance of survival is by taking that risk.

As we move in life, in pursuit of our destiny, we get enough warning signs when we are going wrong ; take note , understand and take corrective measures. There is no harm in even taking a U-Turn when you hit a dead end and start all over again. Destination should not change the route can. 

“Do not give up” does not mean banging the head against a wall. It means logically analysing the actions you are taking to reach the destination, at each stage, and taking corrective measures. It’s better to reach late than to never make it. Staying focused in no ways means fixated ideas . Flexibility in plans is as much a necessity for ensuring success as risk taking ability is. 

“Stay focused on your dream ….

Have flexibility in plans ….

Read the warning signs as they flash….

Take corrective measures as deemed fit….

You will reach the destination ….”

Every child is born to be a Leader…..

 

“We are all leaders; leadership is not a position it is a mindset”

                                                                                           Fredrik Arnander

                                                                                      penguins-leader-1940x900_34162

Leadership quality, or rather the lack of it is one of the main ill from which our society suffers today. The leadership I refer to here is not the political leadership or the leadership in the uniformed forces . Leadership, is not just the domain of politicians or uniformed forces nor the preserve of select industries. Leadership qualities are a must in every human, for the society to progress or at least function as per laid down norms. I am reminded of an advertisement campaign run by the Times of India Newspaper group (Lead India ) , advertisement which prominently figured in last couple of years on national TV. The advertisement featured heavy rains and a road blocked due to a fallen tree . All vehicles are lined up along the road waiting for the tree to be removed. No effort is made by anyone to remove the tree trunk from the road till a young school boy reaches and attempts to push the tree on his own. Seeing the boy initially other children join followed by adults and succeed in pushing the tree away from road. This is one of the finest examples of leadership. The boy exhibited all the qualities a leader should have. These are the quality which every human has, but for various reasons , external and internal, is not willing to exhibit or exploit.

If we analyse the qualities the boy exhibited you will realise that all of us have them but are reluctant to use them .What are the qualities the boy in the advertisement exhibited?

The quality the boy exhibited is he good ‘Values’ or Sanskars , as we may call them in India . This is one of the foremost requirements for a good leader. It is the good values passed on by the parents , teachers / elders which have a major role in the leadership abilities of any human .The good values inculcated by elders will never allow a child to do a wrong or see and tolerate a wrong. It is the Values which give him the confidence of believing in himself and help him /her in the decision making or rather make right decisions for the good of all.

A leader faces any challenge with confidence rather he sees an opportunity in any challenge…….an opportunity to excel.

Decision making is another problem in our society. Starting from a family to any group , usually all actions are dependent on decision of one person who is invariably the head of the family or the group. There is hardly any discussion before arriving on a decision .This has become our mentality over a period of time and thus most of us lack decision making ability even as we grow up and always look towards someone else to take decision on our behalf. Decision making, based on values, has to be inculcated in a person from childhood and this will hold him / her in good stead throughout the life . Emphasis should be on making informed decisions for the good of the family / group/society, keeping all pros and cons in mind .This ability to take right decisions will prevent us from doing wrongs in our daily life, which may include even things like not littering the surroundings. The young boy took a decision of attempting to remove the tree from the road, without waiting for anyone .He led by personal example another quality of  a good leader. What he achieved by leading by personal example?

The boy succeeded in motivating  and making everyone in the crowd believe that it was within their capability to remove the tree. People realised their power . This is another quality of a leader , keeping the group united in crisis and make them realise their potential , infuse confidence in them by personal example and leading from the front .The boy by his action helped others in taking the right decision of joining hands to clear the road . This is another ability of a leader to help his subordinates to take right decision. A good leader will always endeavour to encourage his team members in decision making and leading . The number of leaders he/ she can create is the true reflection of a leader.

Empathy, to feel the pain and problems of all people around is another quality of a good leader .This can only be inculcated by being with the group and living the problems .If one can empathise , he /he will be always in a better position to take a decision for the good of the society. 

Transparency not just in finances but also in decision making is a must for a leader . Transparency is the hall mark of a good leader. A leader can never err in his intent , where as error of judgement may be acceptable.

A good leader is a good team member. For a leader ‘us’ is what matters and not I. Bigger the circle of us the better it is , for there will be more number of helping hands available whenever required .

A good leader should have the ability to see goodness around him. He understands every man has something good in him and uses him for that. He nurtures the good qualities of the team members and makes all efforts to help them in overcoming the shortcomings, if any. He/she will give credit to subordinates for the good they do and praise them. 

A good leader never hesitates in accepting a mistake. One of the greatest quality of a good leader is his ability to take a ‘U’ turn moment he / she realises the mistake. 

A good leader is a good learner and ever willing to learn from everyone and everything around him. One should understand that change is the only constant in this world and one has to keep pace with the change by continuously educating oneself and upgrading skills. Learning can be from elders, subordinates, peers, books etc,

Listening is another good quality of a leader, He should be a patient listener and allow his team members to speak out their mind. This way he will not only gain from the collective wisdom of his team but also arrive at an informed decision for the betterment of the organisation as also help develop leadership qualities in his team members.

Don’t we all have all these qualities in us? These qualities are passed on by elders / teachers to the younger in every family / school. One does not have to be an MBA from renowned management universities to learn or master these qualities.

A leader should his head high and look into the eye of his team members and lead, He / she will never shy away from facing the world as there is nothing to hide and he / she knows the job. 

“Value based eye contact leadership is what is desired from a leader and that is what he will give” 

“A Good leader educates….. empowers the subordinates…..works for the growth of organisation”

You are born to be a Winner……Stop making excuses…Get going….

winner

 You are born to be a winner, born to achieve your dreams / desire. No one, other than your own fears, can stop you from reaching your goal. This will become possible only if you stay focused on the goal . 

Invest your time in arming yourself with the experience, knowledge required to facilitate you in realising your dream. You cannot expect to sleep your way to the top. Even if you were born with a silver spoon still you will have to put in sustained efforts to continuously progress and sustain your position. You have to put in extra effort, burn midnight oil to gain that knowledge. 

There will always be people around, may be some of whom you consider your best friends; discouraging you, trying to demotivate you, wanting you to give up your dream. Surprisingly, the biggest culprits are the parents and teachers. The main responsibility of the parents and teachers is to help the child realise his true potential however in most cases they only attempt to put in too much caution in the mind of the child in the bargain making him risk averse . Attempts are made from very early stage of life to guide the child towards particular professions , dreams are being curbed. Your life is your own responsibility . Whatever you will achieve has to be on your own strength. Where you want to reach has to be your call , solely your decision. “Listen to people , friends but make your own decisions. Once you are yourself convinced of your passion it will not be very difficult to convince others,the difficult part is convincing yourself of what you want to achieve and that you are capable of achieving it” . 

Do what you love. But before taking a final call on what you want to pursue , analyse does it make you happy and more than that for how long will it make / keep you happy ? If the ans is “Yes it will make me happy ( no matter what the end result is )” , by all means follow it . Many of us seek short term happiness and lose the plot . There is nothing wrong in seeking short term happiness provided the final goal is not lost sight of. 

Life is not limited to being a doctor , Engineer , Chartered Accountant , a management expert or a Lawyer. It’s your choice to serve a boss or serve humanity at large. You can be a doctor / engineer and the like and still follow your love of music , singing, adventure or whatever you want. 

You cannot blame others or circumstances for your failure to follow or realise your dream. Failures will be there , but they should not stop you. Failures happen to guide you on to the right path. Looking for excuses and giving up is easy , but “Success comes to those who take ownership of their failures , analyse them and infuse fresh energy and mind to overcome the hurdles”. 

Fear of failure will always be there. Whenever you are confronted by fear reason with yourself , why should you? What will happen if you fail ? Will it be the end? Or you have the strength to start all over again and go after your dream? The ans will come from within. Just be logical , give yourself time. No fear is bigger than your dream. These are small obstacles which many before you have crossed and you are not inferior to anyone. “Financial / educational background , caste , colour , creed doesn’t matter in the pursuit of happiness”. 

People who have realised their dreams had nothing special in them. They are also normal human beings like anyone else. The only difference between them and others is the ‘GO’ they had in them . The never say die attitude , not giving up for any reason. “They did not look for excuses , they searched for ans” . 

So Get up , get going , You will reach your destination . It may take time but reach you will.

 

“No one has slept his way to success …..

Prepare hard , work hard, keep going”